Becoming "Spiritual Not Religious"

 I had many doubts and guilty feelings after leaving Christianity, and I kept going back to it for a number of years. I would go through a cycle of being an evangelical Christian, then a liberal Christian, and then a nonbeliever. It felt like the cycle would never end. But then my father (who was agnostic) passed away in 2012, and I could not accept that he went to hell because he did not believe in Jesus. This firmed up my disbelief in Christianity. My therapist at the time also helped me to see the ambiguity and grey areas in life. I decided I was no longer going to believe in black and white religious beliefs, and since then I have been “spiritual not religious.” I have been adapting various beliefs from different spiritual traditions that work well for me and letting go of those that do not.

Now my mind is much more open, and I am more accepting of other people who may differ from me. I also feel more at peace and I no longer feel guilty about leaving Christianity. I know that I do not need people in my life who do not accept me for who I am. I have plenty of friends and loved ones who do. This has also increased my sense of well-being. However, it is important to keep in mind that you can explore and learn from other belief systems without converting to them. You can benefit from the techniques of mindfulness and meditation without becoming Buddhist, and you can develop the mind/body connection of a Yogi without becoming a Hindu. But it is important to acknowledge the cultures and traditions where these practices come from. This was also an important learning point along my path, that I could adopt wisdom teachings from other traditions without adopting the entire tradition. Becoming “spiritual not religious” was ultimately my journey, but it is also possible to remain religious and still adapt techniques and practices from other ancient wisdom traditions.