Anorexic for God

 After I changed my major to Religious Studies halfway through college, I became more and more serious about becoming a missionary. So much so, that I decided to start preparing my body for the mission field (I assumed I was going to end up somewhere like Africa where the food is sometimes more limited, because that is where I wanted to go). Little by little I started eating less. No one seemed to notice…my roommates, classmates, people at my church or Bible study, etc. But when I went home at the end of the school year my Mom sure noticed after she hugged me. She was shocked! She sent me to the doctor the very next day.

I was already thin at that time in my life, so I had become skin and bones. I spent that summer retraining my brain and gaining the weight back, with the help of a nutrition teacher / fitness coach. She reminded me that I needed to be healthy enough to help others. But it wasn’t easy. I had started to think that I didn’t deserve to have food, when many other people were starving. I remember one time on a field trip in college, I decided to skip lunch and save my lunch money so I could donate it later. But I had become too extreme and my body was suffering.

I was surprised that I was diagnosed as Anorexic, even though I was doing it for God. But my doctor said Anorexia is whenever you’re depriving your body of food, for any reason. This is one of the more extreme experiences I had related to my Scrupulosity / religious OCD issues. I’m thankful my family and nutrition teacher / fitness coach were able to help me get back on track. If you struggle with anything like this, please reach out to someone you trust. As you see in my case, other people don’t always notice, but that doesn’t mean they don’t care. Eating disorders can be very dangerous, so please also seek help from a medical professional.